Ask any Minnesotan and they will tell you that this is "The Greatest State in the Union"

Whether you're scrolling through Citypages, reading through what passes for culture in VitaMN, or browsing comments on the ST messageboards, Minnesotans sure love to brag about their fine state.

"We Minnesotans" is the most common thing you will ever hear out of one of these galoots.  (Oh, Gosh, I must be here too long if things like "galoot" are working their way into my vernacular).  Anyway, most (but not all) Minnesotans are a bragging bunch.  They brag about being the birthplace of Target, Best Buy, 3M, Garrison Keilor, Caribou Coffee and the like. 

Unfortunately, if you were to listen to a Minnesotan for more than a day - as I do every day - you might think that Minnesota invented:

-Modern Sport
-Cures for each and every disease that has killed a man, woman or child since Ganghis Kahn
-The notion that the world is round
-The Atom Bomb
-The elbow straw
-Video tele-conferencing

Truth is, Minnesota has made some contributions to the World at large, but none of us outsiders need to hear about it every stinking minute of the day.  You know the saying, "act like you been there before?"  Kind of applies in this instance, dontchaknow? 

I swear, after hearing all of your drivel, I feel like I'm in a frathouse talking to that guy who brags about being able to suck his own dork.  The novelty has long since worn off, and in the end, I'm trapped in this room with a man who can't really see that fellating his own peni really ain't that cool.  Then again, your techniques for fellating thyself bring new meaning to the phrase "Minnesotans suck."

The GOP Debate in New Hampshire: the true definition of Minnesota Nice on display

Did you see Pawlenty on Sunday?  He was all about lighting up Mitt Romney for Universal Healthcare happening on his watch as the Governor of Mass.  Good Old Tim, a former governor himself, even coined the term "Obamney Care."  That's very cute.  Like, "youbetcha" and "donchaknow?"  I mean, he was really getting a kick out of it on Sunday.

But then Monday rolled around.  And he was in New Hampshire.  Unfortunately for him, so was Mitt Romney.  Even more unfortunate for him, so was CNN's John King, who tried to draw him into his seemingly strong stance the day before. So what happened?  Pawlenty - the Minnesota Nice Coward he is - crawled back into his hole.  Why?  Because he is a passive-aggressive waffler, much like most of the people in this godawful state. 

I'd like to throw in a shot or two about Michelle Bachman, but her representing the redneckiest district in this backwoods state will suffice.  But it begs the question:  do she and Timmy Turn-Into-A-Pussy-While-You're-In-My-Presence Pawlenty belong to the same mega-church that spits out goofy right wing idealogues?